(Not quite) Dead Wrestler Wednesday

One of the hallmarks of this blog during it’s first iteration was a recurring feature called  Dead Wrestler Wednesday. Each week, we’d honor the memory of a deceased wrestler in a nifty little retrospective of their career. While this isn’t a feature that’s been carried over as part of our re-launch, this Wednesday I’d like to talk about a dead wrestler nonetheless. It would seem that former Corporation heavy and Mötley Crüe bodyguard, Test, isn’t quite ready to evacuate this mortal plane.

Andrew “Test” Martin’s onetime girlfriend and former WWE Divas Champion Kelly Kelly apparently occupies a starring role on an E! Network reality series called WAGS – news to me. As it turns out, in the new season, she and the other cast members pay a visit to a Hollywood medium who is able to channel Teflon Test during their session. Kelly Kelly is visibly shaken by the encounter, in which the audience is to believe that the spirit of Test acknowledges her February wedding to former NHL star Sheldon Souray. If Test is indeed reaching out from beyond the grave to extend his blessings to his exes on their nuptial vows, it would only be right that he finally make peace with Stephanie and Hunter before he steps eternally into the great beyond.

Lip Synching is Awwwweesoomme

Soooo, this little kid, Keenan Cahill, is apparently pretty popular on YouTube.  I don’t really understand why this is, but it is, and I won’t question it.  The reason I’m bringing you one of his videos today is because he goes head-to-head with one of the WWE’s most entertaining workers, The Miz, in a lip synching battle, one set to The Miz’s entrance theme no less.  There’s also an appearance by a certain Miz-rival right around the 2:20 mark, so stick with this video until then even if lip synching isn’t your thing.  Because it’s certainly not mine either, but I was entertained.

Let’s All Appreciate Some Japanese Strangeness

This is, without doubt, the best video I’ve ever run on this blog.  Kenny Omega vs a 9-year-old girl who happens to be a better worker than most of the WWE divas.  This is brain-shatteringly awesome; Metlzer had best give it 5 stars.  Keep your eyes peeled for the greatest enziguri you’ll ever witness.  Learn to love Kenny Omega.  Thanks to David Misko for the tip!

Fight of the Living Dead

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It’s no secret that I’m a sucker for campy horror movies that happen to star professional wrestlers.  My enthusiasm over River of Darkness, which featured Kurt Angle, Kevin Nash, and Psycho Sid, has been well documented on this blog, and I’m still anxiously anticipating the release of Diamond Dallas Page’s Black River.  That established, Monster Brawl might be the proverbial king of the mountain when it comes to wrestlers taking part in silver screen gore-fests.

Starring Kevin Nash and “The Mouth of the South” Jimmy Hart, Monster Brawl is a movie about wrestling.  More specifically, it’s a movie about monsters wrestling.  That’s right – eight monsters, along with their managers, participating in a tournament, in a wrestling ring, inside of a graveyard, on pay-per-view, to determine the most powerful monster of all time.  The action will even be called by faux wrestling commentators.  The movie’s promotional website has released a list of the tournament’s combatants, complete with mini-profiles for each.  My money’s on Swamp Gut.

My feeble human brain cannot even begin to process the awesomeness of this.  To the trailer!

Comic-Con in the Bag

As you’re probably aware (if for no other reason than CM Punk’s invasion), the San Diego Comic-Con was last week.  Naturally, an array of soon-to-be-released WWE action figures were on display.  Some were beyond awesome.  Some not so much.  But yesterday, via Cody Rhodes’ Facebook, my favorite picture of the upcoming figures was revealed.

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Hilarious!  Even more hilarious: this video of Cody Rhodes insisting that a number of cos players don paper bags on their heads at the annual comic convention.

Freaks Come Out at Night

These two guys are the preferred topic of conversation in most wrestling circles these days.  One of them is, without doubt, the hottest commodity in the business at the moment.

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And here are the same two guys performing a lap dance, in a wrestling ring, a decade ago.

Colt Cabana reflected on the bizarre incident when asked what the weirdest thing he’d ever had to do in wrestling was.

“…me and CM Punk…once raffled off a lap dance for one lucky woman. I think we hit her from each side while Whodini’s Freaks Come Out At Night blasted on the speakers.”

The Second City Saints have come a long way over the last ten years.  Hail Punk.